I have been working with a client now for the past year. His original reason for seeking my service was to work with a Dietitian/Life Coach to help him stop what he describes as “my out of control eating”. Naturally I was curious about what he meant, so I asked him to explain to me what he means by “out of control eating”. He informed me that after dinner most nights, he would settle in to watch television, but shortly after realizes he is hungry. By this time he would have eaten what he felt was a “good sized” dinner. His nightly routine as he described is as follows:
A 750ml container of yogurt would be eaten while he was warming up a medium-sized pizza in the oven, which he would eat before going to bed. Or, another night’s “snack’ would be half a block of cheese with a sleeve of crackers and half litre of milk. Some nights, he would have another full serving of his supper, or more prepared foods such as pizza pops, prepared dinner meals, or a few sandwiches. Needless to say by the time this client turns into bed at 11:00pm he has eaten more than enough food to last him 3-days or more! Of note, neither he nor his wife does any cooking at home though he said his ‘fridge and freezer are stocked with meats and other foods. The fresh fruits and vegetables go bad and are thrown out regularly. He also buys lunch from the local food court most days as he has no time to prepare it over night.
I was more interested in what was pushing him to eat in this clearly destructive way rather than what he was actually eating. I felt that the reason (s) behind this way of using food would be more relevant to helping this client get out of his way and achieve his stated goal of controlling his out of control eating. What was really interesting with this client was his insistence that if he could get a meal plan that outlines what foods to eat, how much to eat and when to eat he would be better able to control his eating. I complied with his request but only after creating awareness with him that a meal plan is equivalent to a Band-Aid. Only after he explores through coaching the reasons for his actions would he be free of this “out of control eating”.
A plan was put together for our client, which he followed diligently for all of two weeks! He was quite puzzled but admitted he was still hungry after eating the allotted meals on the plan (which were generous and spread out throughout the day) and as a result ended up right where he had started. He felt he was clearly getting in his way and wanted to know how to conquer this habit. He agreed to using life coaching at this point which proved to be a very powerful and revealing exercise for him. He shared that he was experiencing a significant financial crisis and was facing even more expenses as the single family vehicle needed to be replaced. Both he and his wife use credit with reckless abandon. There was no system in place to check and balance their source of income. Money was a big source of worry for this client and he and his wife were not able to talk about it. He believed that as a male it was his responsibility to provide for his family, though both he and his wife worked full-time, he was reluctant to ask for her help.
The strategies that he came up with just by me asking him some key questions were as followed: engage his wife in an honest discussion about their current situation; identify how much money is coming in and how much is going out; identify sources of expenses that were essential and non-essential; commit to working together with his coach to create a life strategy that sees them slowly chip away at their mounting expenses. These were the first steps he identified and we continue working on him getting out of his way.
Beliefs are both unconscious and conscious; either way they are like an iceberg, what is seen is not reflective of the depth, breadth and strength of the unseen portion. Beliefs can and do get in the way of us living at our ultimate potentials. In order to live to our ultimate potentials we must excavate and learn about our beliefs, associations and behaviours and how they show up in our lives.
A Life Coach is a great resource to use to help you create a life plan. A Coach will work with you to provide tangible results and support you in transferring these results in all other aspects of your life. A coach will support you to be accountable to your self-development goals, as well as stop to celebrate your achievements along the way.
